love.

[tobu]

I'm in love. I have been for years. She is my best friend. She is funny, she is smart - I want to grow old with her. She lived with me for three months and it was one of the best times of my life but now it's turn sour.

I'll start by explaining our relationship the best I can. I love her and she loves me. She is two years younger than me (17 is her age). I met her when she was 13. Many of you may have heard me mention her before. Over the last five years we have gorwn closer and closer to each other. I helped her through a rough part of her life. We have never been sexually intermit and dispite the fact we are both attracted to each other I have always discouraged it because i'm a monster and would lose her or lose myself to her. Three months ago she moved from Townsville to brisbane to live with me. Her boyfriend of 6 months followed soon after. He lived on the other side of town and she lived with me. He trusts me(i hope). And all was good untill..... i went on holidays to townsville for a week. In Townsville i ran into one of her old school friends... a very nice young girl whose eye's i fall headlong into. We spend one night together. it's all the time we have and I fly back to brisbane.

When I get back I tell my best friend about what happen's. She cries silently and doesn't talk to me except to tell me that i've hurt her very much. (and she posted pictures of me in a dress to the fridge with the word "PWNED" written in lipstick across the fridge.) The next day, in hope to open communications, i spend an awful lot of money on booze and other assorted fun items. We both get really trashed and cry into each others arms. She hints that she has always loved me as more than a friend and that i made her feel worthless by getting with her friend so easily. I'm perplexed because she has a boyfriend but i understand. I try and tell that it wouldn't work... but i've had that line used on me before and I know how little it helps..

the day after she left. she moved back to townsville. we have barely talked in a week.

Now the girl i got with is calling me to tell me that she is interested in me. i'm so confused.

i'm not really looking for answers here.. i just wanted to share.

[alivin]

"the day after she left. she moved back to townsville"

I'm sorry to say it but that is probably the best thing to have happened. She appears to be confused(and you too of course)
Did you talk to her boyfriend ? to make sure he doesn't think you made a move on her. Early relationship stuff is tough but it probably will get easier, although it depends who you talk to.

[vass0922]

Have you two ever talked about a relationship?
Has she ever alluded to you she was interested?

I think if the two of you really are interested in each other, then both should be open to communications.

If she truely does want to be 'more than a friend' she'll go into a hole for a while, but eventually after she's thought it through a bit, she'll poke her head back out.

[Mickwish]

Tough situation, Toby. Relationships aren't always easy. This one needs a bit of work if ya wanna make something of it.

That's the question. Do you wanna make something of it? Spend your life with her? Well, if you do, it's worth pursuing. If not... let her go her way, and you go yours.

This the girl who went to Israel or somewhere for a bit? Sounds like she is as mixed up (or maybe even more, if that's possible ) as you.

Want to work it out? Talk. Communicate. Face to face (the only real way - virtual doesn't cut it in this situation, IMO).

Good luck with whatever you decide. But DO make a decision, one way or another. Not making a decision will be something you will regret for a loooong time.

Having said all that... I'm no relationship guru.

Cheers
Mick

[chipbgt]

Well, thats a weird situation to be in, and the only advice I have is harsh so I wont bother saying anything unless asked....like ya said, your not looking for advice, just sharing.

[washe]

My best advice is take a desicion dont leave the maybe to your mind. Speak face to face, tell her how you feel, If i picked the dates correctly you are 19..... well enjoy your life you are still pretty young, it would be the end of the world if the relationship goes sour after you speak.

[GroundZero3]

hey cat, sorry to hear about your situation

i perfectly know how you feel as i have something similar happen to me and my friend.

If you want to talk, message me anytime.

[sao95]

what does "PWNED" stand for?

[GroundZero3]

pwned = owned

frequently used by computer gamers

[George VII]

I'm sorry to hear about your situation man, I'm going through a nasty time too...it's no fun, but we all get through it. I'll be prayin' for you two!