Excerpt from a Dog's diary!
[Day 181]
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
[DAY 182]
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
Excerpt from a Cat's diary!
DAY 752 : My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat while i am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat a house plant.
DAY 761: Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while the were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and revolt my vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair ... Must try this in their beds.
DAY 765: Decapitated a mouse and brought the headless body to them, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat i was. Hmm. not working according to plan.
DAY 768: i am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason i was chosen for water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo". What sick mind could have invented such a liquid? My only consolation is the piece of skin stuck under my claws.
DAY 771: There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could here noise and smell the foul odour of the glass tubes the call "beer" More importantly i over heard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies". Must learn more and how i can use these new found powers.
DAY 774: I am convinced the other captives are flukies and maybe snitch. The dog is routinely released and is happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them on regular occasions. I am certain he reports my every move.
Due to his current placement in a metal room his safety is assured but i can wait, It is only a matter of time.....
hardware
prices 
I've read the cat's diary before.. It's hysterical the 2nd time too 
