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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:22 PM   Digg it!   #1 (permalink)
MDS
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termination parental rights

OK here it goes My wifes ex has failed to pay his child support and is over 6k behind. In the state of Kansas the SRS handles all child support issues and when a parrent gets behind they take that parrent to court. OK here's the deal the wifes ex just got summons to apear in court to determine why he should not be held in comtempt of court for violating a court order to pay support. He has never carried insurance on the child and was ordered to do so or pay 92% of medical cost which he hasn't done. There has been a great amount of medical debt for this child and I the step-dad have footed the bills to the best of my ability. They are now down to less than 1k and I have insurance on him. Now after recieving court papers he calls my wife today cusses and threatens her until she finally hangs up on this creap. He now wants to terminate he right so he doesn't have to pay his support. In Kansas the only way he can do this since he owes back support is if my wife signs for him to terminate his rights. This would make his back support and back medical bills no longer his requirment. What do you think about this? Should she sign to jus let this deadbeat off and I will continue to pay the debt that acured prior to me getting married to my wife or would you make him pay his debt. I personally think that if he pays his back debt then she should sign the termination papers and have it done with. I would love to adapt this child when I get the $$'s to do so. The wife has to call SRS and let their att. know tomarrow what he's tring to do and see what they think since they have a pending case against him.
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:33 PM     #2 (permalink)
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Hi MDS, Sorry to hear that you are going through these troubles. I sounds as if you are the "True" father in this case. I admire you for your love of your wife and the child as well. That is alot to be said for.

As for the deadbeat, the rules are the same here as well in Kansas, I am wanting to terminate my ex's rights as he is over 13k in debt in child support back payments this includes also terminating any past due debts. My problem is that I can't afford the attorney fees to get this done. Geezzz, anyhow and also for me to terminate his rights he has to have also abandoned the kids meaning absolutely no contact with the children whatsoever in any form for a mimumun of one year, which is not a problem for me either.

I think in your sitution its boils down to what you and your wife want to do. I can understand why you would want the deadbeat to pay off the debt. However, do you honestly belive he will all of a sudden reform and start paying child support and medical support payments after not paying for so long?

Personally I don't think the ex will reform at all. So then it boils down to what you and your wife wants to do. At this point there is nothing lost as you already have been paying for everything and have treated the child as your own. If anything you have gained from the entire situation not finicially but rather emotionally, mentally, phyically, and spirtually by benifiting of having a great wife and child you love very much. No amount of cash will ever be able to replace that.
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:42 PM     #3 (permalink)
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Neo the attorney thing is another thing that we would be faced with because if he goes through with tring to terminate my wife still would have to a an attorney with here at court even if she decides to sign the papers because their would have to be a court hearing to determ if he can self terminate his rights. Also he still owes $$ to SRS for birthing cost and I don't know how that would effect the delima. Also to add if he found in comtempt of court he will be placed under arrest til he pays 60% of the back ballence.

Last edited by MDS : November 3rd, 2002 at 10:45 PM.
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:49 PM     #4 (permalink)
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How can ya resist with a face like this
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:53 PM     #5 (permalink)
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Correct me if I am wrong, it sounds to me as if your wife's ex is going to try and push for terminition of his rights. So utilitmaly both of you would have to show up in court for this with both parties having an attorney and parties own expense.

So i am to understand it could be possible that no matter what you and your wife chooses that both of you will still have to retain a attoreny.

Which leaves the question should you both just sign off the papers and allow him off the hook. Techically I think it would be easier in the long run fincially as it will be a short quick attoreny fee to you. However, if you choose not to allow him to terminiate his rights the court seessions can be come long and drawn out. and costly.

In my own shoes if my ex opted to sign release to all parental rights i'd jump at the chance only because i want him out of our lives permanantly. he rarely contacts them or myself so that is me, and would personally jump at the chance.

Is it possible to find out if you MUST retain a an attorney if the ex is prompting for termination of rights and other discussions? Can you find this out?

The important question right now is: What do you and your wife want? Do you want to try and continue a long battle to get payments from him? Or just say good bye jerk and he is gone from your lives permantly with no rights whatsoever?
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 10:56 PM     #6 (permalink)
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That pic looks like he is looking up to you with total love and adoration. He is a keeper.
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 11:02 PM     #7 (permalink)
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I personaly whould like to jus have his rights terminated and my wife isn't shure as she still has it in here thick head that he will be made to pay atleast his back debt before signing away. Either way I'm looking at aprox. $500 for the attorney and if it was settled in one court visit would be fine with me. I wish I could use the $500's to adopt him instead of this cr@p but in time I will get the money for that also. I have raised him since he was 5months old and his biological dad has seen him one time when he was jus 1 two years ago.
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 11:02 PM     #8 (permalink)
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The guy's a creep. The child is the innocent one here. You do what you've been doing - the right thing.


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Old November 3rd, 2002, 11:04 PM     #9 (permalink)
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Thanks Neo and Kenyg he jus turned 3 on oct. 31
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Old November 3rd, 2002, 11:05 PM     #10 (permalink)
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Don't let him SLIDE !!!!!!!!!

Make the SOB...POS pay and pay. Get a tape recorder on your phone and if threatens her in any way put the B..stard in jail and make him sweat it out. No mercy for people ( animals) like that. I'm not talkinng revennge , just retribution!!!!!!!!
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